Confessions Of A (Very) Bored Teacher


Disclaimer: Mr Bryan, if you see this, please do not grade my work.


So on a perfectly lovely Sunday morning, Ms Jazzyme was hard at work, being a good teacher.

The kids came and went, temporarily filling the centre with laughter and innocent childish voices.

"Teacher, teacher, she draw on the board!" "Teacher I never!" "Teacher she pinch me!" "Teacher she never finish her work!"

And then it was all silence.

"You're going to be alright, girl," Ms Jazzyme muttered to herself. She hated to be alone at the centre. She was terrified of the Blue Room, where it was always dark, even when the day was at its brightest.

She turned the music on with the computer, from AOL Radio. Daughtry's 'No Surprise' was on. She liked this song.

"Files, files, files. Sleeves, sleeves, sleeves. Stapler, stapler, stapler. Staples, staples... staples?"

To her horror, there were no staples left! She pried open the stapler that she was holding. There was about a quarter of staples left inside. She crossed her fingers and hoped that the file she was about to duplicate would not require too many stapled documents.

So she began the arduous duplicating process. She seemed to work seamlessly with the trusty new copier machine, every movement gracefully cohesive with the speed of the documents the machine was spewing out.

It happened to suddenly that she didn't quite catch on initially.

"Ka-ching! Ka-ching ka-ching ka-ching ka-ching ka-ching ka-ching!" As with everybody else who's ever had staples run out on them in the midst of doing monotonous work, Ms Jazzyme pressed the stapler a few more times than was neccessary.

"What do I do now?" Mortified at the prospect of spending the rest of the day staring out of the window, she frantically searched the reception desk for any traces of leftovers.

It was then that she saw it.

It was beautiful. Big, bold and blue, it had a shine to it that practically screamed out to be used. It was big, with a real big bottom. She liked them big.

She grabbed it and dashed back into the office, where papers were strewn all over the table.

"Ka-snap! Ka-snap!" The powerful Big Blue has lived up to expectations. Despite its bulky size, it was surprisingly light and yielded to the touch. It vibrated in delight at being paid attention to once again.

Ms Jazzyme was enjoying herself with Big Blue, carefully counting the number of big staples left. With just 5 more plastic sleeves to go, disaster struck again.

Big Blue finally gave up, exhausted. Ms Jazzyme had been taking so much that it had nothing left to give. With the mountain of papers piling up on the desks and the copier machine still vomiting a warm stream of printed papers, she was desperate.

There was no time to mourn for Big Blue. Ms Jazzyme had to think fast. She strode up and down the length of the centre, as a thoughtful tiger contemplating its next prey would. Then something caught her eye.

It was tiny, hardly fit to be called Little Green. It was more of a Little Turqoise or a Little Cyan. Ms Jazzyme decided to call it Little Turyan.

Little Turyan looked weak and feeble, and Ms Jazzyme wondered if it would make it through the rest of the 5 sleeves.

Big Blue stared on with disregard, as if it half expected Little Turyan to break down upon first impact with paper.

Crossing her fingers, Ms Jazzyme held Little Turyan to the papers and pressed gently on its head.

"Ka-snap! " It let out a tiny, shy little click. It didn't break! Hurrah!

Little Turyan got bolder with each new click. By the end of the last plastic sleeve Little Turyan was booming away, making snapping sounds almost equal to Big Blue.

"There we are! All done!" Ms Jazzyme put the last piece of stapled document into its sleeve and put everything back into its place.

Big Blue stood regally next to Little Turyan, who looked equally satisfied with itself. Little Chomper, which was sitting nearby, occasionally used to take out staples from documents, looked pretty darn happy with itself.

All in a day's work for Ms Jazzyme. She put on a satisfied grin and sat back to watch the clock tick. Countdown to the end of a working Sunday begins!


Stay tuned for more exciting Adventures Of Ms Jazzyme At Work!