Pictures from Tracy's 8th Birthday on 22 Nov

Pawtobello Pet Cafe

Editing Photos Right Now


Get ready for the overload!

My Baby Tracy

I Never Thought That I Too Can Become A Machine


I talk in the appropriate situations.

I laugh when given cue.

At a gesture or a hint, I react.

I put a smile on my face in front of the people that matter.

But who knows what lurks beneath that smile? Even I don't know.

I occasionally raise my voice up a few octaves and act my age when facing male clients.

But I am not my age. I wish I were. You don't know how hard it is to not be my age when I am.

I mechanically go to work, and mechanically come back home and without realizing it, I've become the product that which I most feared I would be.

I no longer feel the vibe that I once did, that life was full of meaning. Now I feel that nothing holds much meaning, that I'm just going to live my life just the way everyone else does. A normal, plain, conventional life.

I, like the rest of the whole wide world, am just a greyhound, chasing after a mechanical white rabbit. Some push others out of the way to get in front, some get left behind, still running and panting after the rabbit. If not for our vests with numbers on it, nobody can differentiate who we are, except that a lot of dogs are running together.

I was an artist. I loved everything and found joy in the simplest of things. I was abstract and slightly kooky. Now I live each day from paycheck to paycheck, waiting for life to pass me by, soon to reminiscing in my wheelchair in my 60s about the time I wasted on the material things in life. About my very normal, healthy, and spice free life.

So there I go. A normal girl with a normal life.

What more can I want?

Exhausted


I can safely tell you that, last Saturday was one of the rare few days that I wasn't sleepy throughout the entire day. With work and classes and the addition of Mandy, the world's turned topsy turvey. Which explains why I haven't been blogging like the good little kitty that I am.

*trying to find more excuses as to why I haven't blogged for so long*



You'll be overloaded with photos once I find a break in the middle, like this on a Saturday afternoon when Lazy is still asleep, and edit all my pictures for hosting.


The ultimate combination.

A lot has been happening since my blogging hiatus, which hasn't ended yet because everything around me is still topsy turvey, such as ... ... never mind. Never too good to divulge everything at one go I always say.



Just a little sneak preview today of how life's been like..



That's Rycel on top and that's Benny below, between games during our weekly Friday and Saturday midnight mahjong match. I got to know these two eons ago when I was still in primary school, after I moved house and gathered up the courage to play basketball there alone.



Rycel, better known as Onn, is the joker of the whole group that used to be. He still is, and he regularly drives Lazy and Benny crazy with his mad antics during mahjong.



Well folks, this is all the time we have today, and I thank you sincerely for being here and being so patience and understanding blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda.

Gotta scoot!

My Eyes Hurt


They've been red and watery since Friday. I think it's because I've been eyeing the cute guys that keep walking in and out of our worksite area (wait, did I say guys? I meant guy) I hope it's sore eye, so I can infect pretty much everyone at office! Bwahahaha!

Anyways, for lack of something to say, I'm digging up old pictures to talk about.


My baby stands out among the rest.

I took my 2A TP on 6 Nov. I had originally expected to only meet Daniel, Lazy's colleague, but ended up meeting more than I thought was possibly possible.



That's OnceEarth on the left with number 16, Tiantian in the middle with her ponytail, and Daniel's ah beng arm on the right. A secondary school classmate of mine, Andrew, was sitting a few rows behind me. And this girl we recognised as to be someone from the forums but didn't want to talk to.

It was fun. Raining heavily though, which explains what happened next.



At the waiting room after the test, they called out THREE people. Out of possibly 80 over people. Three. When the three had their papers handed to them and went off, the rest of the entire room was told that they passed. Myself included, of course.

So yay. There. Got my 2A. Next step - class 3!

I'm hungry. Let's talk about food now.

This is calamari, from Spizza.



Ain't cheap at $11 a pop, but they're worth every single damn cent. The salsa sauce that they come with is heavenly. When you take a piece of calamari, dip it in the sauce and put it into your mouth, you suddenly understand the true meaning of euphoria. I'm practically drooling right now thinking about it.

It's a crying shame when I can safely say that these cowabungas were (at the point of consumption) the best doughnuts I've ever had.



These little mommas weren't exactly pipin' hot, and they looked like shit, but they were mouth-watering. I got them from Suntec as a congratulatory present after passing a certain work-related exam.

Because I was riding, these were stuffed without thought into my bag and brought home. Still, there really were awesome. Mint Dark Chocolate from Suntec's doughnut factory. Try it.

(After much debate, the Double Chocolate from the same outlet has been dubbed "King of the Chocolate doughnuts", purely for the surprise it concealed inside.)

On a chocolate related note, the most expensive chocolate ever bought for me were these.



With a grand total of $40. Nope, they're not from Lazy. They're from my sister, who bought them on a whim when we were out shopping at Harbourfront.





Try some. They're rich and totally melts in your mouth.

This is the spread both Lazy and I made together on Lazy's birthday.



It's not much (we were broke after getting Mandy), but it's home. Where there's love, there's home, right?



This is also not a work of Lazy's. These prawns are given to my mom by her friend, who in turn cooked it and made it so to show us that she has itchy hands. The being the very creative yours truly, I shelled and checked a bwol into the freezer.

20 minutes and 3 packets of McDee's mayonnaise later, it became this:



Nice.

The next entree is actually a complain case. You can see for yourself.



Need I say more?

Last post of Angie-turned-Mandy for this week


I realized that I've posted too much on Angie/Mandy ever since she came home.

Oh by the way, Lazy's changed her name to Mandy, after Mandy of The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy.



He thinks I look like Mandy most of the time, but doesn't dare to call me that straight to my face. Bwahahahaha! So from controlling himself from calling me Mandy for too long, he's decided to call Angie, Mandy. Mom wants to call her Kiki, but that's another matter altogether.

So, here are even more pictures of Mandy!




"Tracy ah, don't leave your bear bears lying all over the floor ah!"

My Lazy and my Mandy





"Who's a pretty girl?"





The sisters.

More photos from the digicam


Yuffie asked for more photos, so here they are!

Lazy with our girls...







Tracy wants a piece of the action too.



Here's the cute part:

BIG News


Here it goes!

We've been going to the Pasir Ris farmway for three weeks in a row to find the perfect puppy. There were many to choose from, but she was the only one who captured our hearts.



Her name is Angie, the Lazy bought her for my 21st birthday. It's two months away, but we're impatient people. Heh.

Many people worried about how my mom would react. Don't worry, she knew about this some time ago when Lazy asked her for permission to buy a dog for me. She actually told him that she herself was planning to buy one for my 21st birthday.



We tried many different names, and finally settled on Angie. She's two months old (DOB 3rd Sep 2007), and she's the sweetest girl ever. She's quite big boned, and very playful. She seems to like Lazy a lot too, because I am the fiercer one. Argh.



We got a huge cage that will hopefully be big enough for her when she grows up. Lazy had a hard time bringing it up to my house.



Today's only her first day, and we still have our hands full trying to get her settled down.

More pictures next time!

Teh Orbit Saga


In case you're wondering what the heck the title's about, it The Office Saga.



Just a little update on the happenings in orbit. We've been moving around a lot (okay, twice) and we've finally settled in to our permenant area.

This was my table at the temporary site:



Barren and empty. I didn't even bother with the unpacking because we'd only be packing up and moving again.

The entire department helped with the moving. Sounds like it'd be a fast one? Think again.



Too many people using eye power (and one stoning away) for the move to be efficient. The line leading out the door was the production line, whereby someone from inside takes out a pen, and passes on the the next person, who passes on to the next person, and the next, and the next, and the last person puts it into the box. At this rate, you can imagine how late it was when the move completed. Lucky for me I left early. Hiak hiak!

This is my new table! I love it to bits.



May-jie walked past my table today and commented on the photo about Anthony.

Common friend la, that si zai bao (死仔包）.

That was cute?


What about this?

Remember Me?




Do I look familiar to you?

My name is Sambal, and my mummy and daddy loves me a lot. I like to stick to them all the time. Daddy says I'm all grown up and is so proud of me. He recently sent my all-grown-up photo to my temporary mummy last time, and she almost cried.

Here I am!



Daddy says I'm big. And fat. But I still like to follow them everywhere like I followed my old mummy.

Enough already


The previous post garnered a record-breaking (for this blog) number of comments within a few days.

Thanks for the comments guys, really appreciate it.

However, certain things have changed since then, and I've had absolutely NO time to update. I apologise.

I still have no time to address certain issues, including a published and two unpublished comments, which were left unpublished because I wanted to address them individually, but I guess you'll just have to wait til I have the time.

Work's getting crazier and crazier. Workload's a lot more than normal because as time progresses, more and more responsibilities are hurled on to our shoulders. In time to come, I won't even have the time to enjoy a quiet hour or so with a novel.

Just a quick reminder though, this is still my blog, and the only outlet on which to unleash all my pent up whatsoever. Think, before you judge.

I have to go. I hope I'll have the time soon to address the issues and post new stuff, and hopefully be able to tell you guys some BIG news. Heh.

It's dead


It's more dead than ever before. But I'm just letting it be. I'm not taking any actions to change anything.

Maybe I've become afraid of change.

It feels as though we have nothing else left to lose, and he's taking advantage of this fact to trash me down on the ground further.

Either totally oblivious, or totally not caring. Most probably it's the latter.

I feel like we're fighting a battle every time this happens. And every time I'm on the losing end because I'm the only one who bothers to make the effort to construct the relationship back together again. Once I make the effort, it automatically becomes a losing battle because I'm the only one thinking, and he'll just be sitting there fuming away while I try to get him to calm down by conceding to his accusations and demands.

It's like pushing a helpless dog into a corner and then kicking it in the ribs just because all the dog wants is your attention and affection.

Yes, I have become a dog. His bitch. Always at his beck and call, always obedient, a toe out of line and it's the whip. Wait at home by the door while he's out to wherever, happily jumping up and licking his face when he comes back. When he wants to play, all he has to do is to pick up the ball. When I want to play, it must depend on his mood, whether he is willing to pick up the ball or not.

I have become his bitch.

Anger


Hot.. boiling... rage.. rising like molten lava inside a volcano, waiting, biding it's time, waiting for the right time to erupt.

Cool and calm on the outside, standing right beside you. You cannot see the rage. You don't understand.

You don't even try. You don't even make the effort.

I don't, anymore. You know I don't. You just don't want to face it.

Cute


Oh my gosh Corbin Bleu has me swooning like a lovestruck teenager! Especially when he ties his hair back..



He's only 19 this year, and already so annoyingly eye-catching. Who knows how many little girls' hearts he'll break when he gets older?

You gotta watch this:



Sigh... Thank goodness he's still young. I like Pierce Brosnan types. And Richard Gere. And George Clooney. Argh. Sexy. Sexy. Sexy.. *knees crumbles*

Calling for any Insurance Agents!


Hi guys, as you all may already know by now, I'm working in an insurance firm. However, much as I love my company and the plans they provide (I bought the very plans I'm selling), ACE does not have life/endowment plans.

So, I'm calling out to any insurance agents (note: agents only, not applicable to FAs)!

Whichever company you're from, I have questions for you. And if I like what I hear, I'll buy from you. However standard rules apply:

1) Don't calculate my finance for me
2) Don't pressurize me / No hard-selling (I mean it, if you do that I will get angry)
3) For goodness' sake don't meet me at McDonald's or Burger King
4) Don't ask me for referrals / Don't attack anyone I'm with

I'd like it if you could let me take a look at the policy wordings as well.

What's the good thing about this deal, you ask? Well for one, you get to meet the infamous (in this blog only) Jazzyme, two, you make a new friend (or meet an old one), and three, you potentially get to close the deal. But lets not make that the highlight of the talk unless I'm really sure about it.

Give me a hollar at southparkjazz@yahoo.com with your details and I'll confirm + chop + guarantee contact you, whether or not I'm meeting you.

It's Dead


... but is it dead enough?

Uncertainties


So many unhappy things I can't tell him about.

So much anger.

So much disappointment.

So many uncertainties I can't talk to him about.

The future.

Are we just wasting our time and our youths on something that might not have a future? Will we, ten - twenty years down the road, still be single and look back and feel frustrated that we didn't take a hold of our own lives when we could?

I feel as though I'm just here for the heck of it. I feel that he is too, because he has no other choice. It's just so bland, no effort, no nothing. It's been this way all along. I was blind to believe that there could be any other way when there isn't.

I used to have a tinge of jealousy when others received flowers and gifts and have their other halves made the effort to keep the love and the romance going. Now everything's just bland. We're both just thankful that the glitches are getting smaller and smaller, much less hope for romance or effort of any kind at all.

I've been so moody for these past .. god knows how long.

This can only mean one thing.















PMS is here. Heh.