Minibean!


I'm sorry this took so long, Ting. Anyway but anyway, better late than never, right?

From http://joewei.blogspot.com/,



This is Ting with Minibean. "Minibean" because Ting is a fussy mummy, she's still undecided on names for little Minibean.

Minibean is 12 days old today!

I remember Ting blogging about the day her water bag burst; most of us readers were even more excited about the delivery than she was!

Now begins the tiny steps and the curbing of every milestone. We're all with you, Ting!

I love you guys


Roger's back from Australia!


Paiseh ah Roger, I forgot to upload the nice photo of you on your bike. Here's a kuku one of you turning into jelly from the jetlag instead.

Well, after letting him settle in for a day, we dragged him out to Anthony's father's BBQ stingray stall in Toa Payoh.



This is the super delicious spread his father made for us. Recommended for staring at when really hungry. Just try to keep your drool off your keyboard.



And this is supposedly for Anthony, who passed his 2A licence that morning. But we all just snatched together anyway.



And woah! The lobster was AWESOME! So was the stingray, and the kung pao diced chicken, and the kang kong, and the black pepper beef (from the last time we went), which basically means everything was good.

Chilli lovers will love this stall. Ask me for the address then.

Anyway, not surprisingly, we finished every single thing on the table. Anthony's father joined us soon after too.




Don't they look alike? Check out his signboard behind him.

And then, inevitably, with two camwhores at one table, we did what me and Anthony loved to do so much.

Camwhore.





And together with Anthony's father (who I suspect to be a bit of a camwhore as well).

Thanks Alex!


I made a little boo-boo in my previous post on December the 9th. It was Pippen who was singing that song, not Merri.

Anyway, I got a surprise from Alex today. He sent me a file titled "Pippen's song" and so, yay~ I have the song!

Thanks Alex!

Hypocrites


There was a recent bicker between me an a certain someone who gets on everyone's nerves in the Aprilian thread.

Some of the more prominent people in the club actually agree with me about what I think about this certain someone. One of them even called to tell me about it.

However, when back in the forums, in full view of everyone, they act all benevolent, telling people that they "do not want any more fighting".

You're a hypocrite, you know that, bro?

The thing was swept under the carpet. And believe me, like all things swept under the carpet this will get blown up into something big in the future.

On a similar topic, today I shall talk about a certain organization, or "club".

This club has:

Hypocrites.

People who are seperated into different groups: (1) The standard group of friends with mixed bikes. (2) The pro-Aprilians. (3) The people who keep very silent and only pop out whenever the word "club management" is mentioned.

One very irritating and annoying buck-toothed person.

Some malay mat called Amin who is an anoying brat for simply breathing the same oxygen as I am. Oh, and he's also riding illegally.

Two-faced asses who quarrel with you in private, but act all chummy with you in the forums.

People who don't really give a damn about you until they need help from you.

People who act all knowledgable and stop debates when they themselves get into debates all the time.

People with the "I forking hate this guy but I need to act nice to him for the sake of the club name."

People who bring out the club name for no reason at all at every single opportunity.

Have meetings all the time about running the club, but with most of the important people missing (i.e the actual members of the club). Attending those meetings are mostly the aforementioned people who only jump out whenever the words "club management" are mumbled.

And what is this called?

It's called Aprilian politics. And this is why, boy and girls, you should never join the ARC as a member officially, but should do so as a friend.

Looking for a song


You know, in the movie the Lord of the Rings, I'm not sure whether it's in the 2nd or 3rd but there's this scene where the king of somewhere sent his son to a battle which everyone knew was a suicide mission.

As his son rode to his death, the king ate heartily, and Merri sat by his side. The king asked Merri to sing a song for his entertainment, and Merri did.

It was very sad and heart wrenching, to see the usual playful Merri to sit so sober and sad, singing his heart out.

Now comes the question: What is that song that Merri is singing? Does anyone have the title of that song?

All I want for Christmas...



What I want for Christmas?

Do you really want to know?

It doesn't cost much, in fact it costs next to nothing at all.

It's nothing material. It's not worth millions (although it should be).

It's nothing consumable. Or maybe some parts of it is.

It's just something that makes your *heart beats faster, breath shorter, crotch wetter, and make you squeal uncontrollably when you see it.

Do you really want to know?




-->






-->





-->







*gushes*

The DUDE, not the book... THE DUDE!!!

*nosebleeds*

Must.. tear.. eyes...... away........ Need.... to......... work! .... Need.. to... stop... nosebleed.. as well......


* Applies only to females and some special males.

Another Accident


Only this time it's one of us.

The Aprilians were at Malaysia's Pasir Gudang track yesterday morning. One of them, Jin Han, skid and flew. Whilst still in mid-air, his helmet flew off, and he landed headfirst into the tarmac.

According to Samuel, when they got to him he kept vomiting blood, and blood was coming out of his nose non-stop. Samuel had to keep wiping the blood away for him in case he chokes. He was still conscious, able to respond.

He lost a lot of blood.

It was too dangerous to transfer him back to Singapore, so they decided to operate on him in Malaysia instead. He had to wait, with a fractured skull, for 9 whole hours, in line. I think they're still operating on him now.

The Aprilian group is, thankfully, more than ready to help. Already a lot of people are volunteering to donate blood to him because he lost so much.

People, please help me pray for his safety. I don't want to lose another friend.

Jin Han, you'll be okay. You'll be fine. We promise.

Suicide... or Not.


Woke up to the sound of many voices talking at 7 in the morning. I thought they belonged to the school kids who were on their way to school, so I went back to sleep. It was only at 8.30am when I woke up for work that I wondered what was wrong. It's the school holidays, how can there be so many people going to school? Further more, how can they still be on their way to school at this hour, even if they did have school?

I looked out the window and saw this.



I was still at the window when another car pulled in. Even before it stopped, a man jumped from the passenger side and ran to the scene. He tried to flip open the tent, but the police stopped him. He kept crying and crying. Afterwards when he kind of got into a state of shock, he just squatted in a corner, staring at the tent and crying.

Was it suicide, or an accident?

Whatever it was, I extend my deepest condolences to the deceased's family and friends.

Such is humanity.

*UPDATED* Found out from the neighbourhood grapvine (read: Lazychoo's mum) that the deceased was a 40 plus year old woman, who was cleaning her living room windows when she accidently plummeted to her demise.

That man I saw must've been her husband.

My deepest condolences again. May she rest in peace. Or something.

Reality Tip of the day


It's important that, when you get a Significant Other (thereafter abbreviated as SO), to ensure that your friends like your SO and your SO likes your friends.

Try to get your friends to not pass judgement and scrutinize your SO. I'm pretty sure most people as SOs won't pass any judgement about your friends too fast because he'she'd be too worried about whether they like him/her or not.

Example: While out with your friends one day, he/she was talking to you about how he/she felt that time, and used a word that sounded pretty normal but somehow or other it offended your friend.

(Ok, I'm just using this post as an excuse to rant. Let me rant for a moment: So you think the word "sophisticated" must mean you lah? You really think you very sophisticated meh? I think sophisticated isn't a word for you. However, the words "petty" and "selfish" are. Big blardy fork.)

And your friend gives your SO that really kiam-pa (asking to be beaten), holier-than-thou face.

(You're just lucky Lazychoo is a person who thinks that time actually means something, or else even Lazychoo would've deserted you a long time ago.)

If your friends like to gossip about your SO, please make sure that your SO never get wind of it, because it feels like you're betraying him/her by gossiping together with them.

(I don't know and I don't care anymore whether you like me or not. I know I don't like you can, liao.)

If so becomes that your SO starts disliking your friends, he/she will give the exact attitude that a certain blog mistress is giving now. Rolling his/her eyes whenever they hear your friend's name, or clapping in glee when a gathering with that specific friend is called-off, or not wanting to go out with the entire group when that one friend is there, or blog about it and rant when you want to give the extra tickets to watch a show to your friend so you could all go together.

Du-lan. Super du-lan.

You think you very sophisticated, meh?

We're damn sexy people


How sexy is your name?

J

You can be super romantic, attached to the glamour of love. Having a partner is of paramount importance to you.You are free in your expression of love and are willing to take chances, try new sexual experiences and partners, provided it's all in good taste. Brains turn you on. You must feel that your partner is intellectually stimulating otherwise you will find it difficult to sustain the relationship. You require loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know that you're being appreciated.


K

Once you get it into your head that you want someone, you move full steam ahead in pursuit. You do not give up your quest easily. You are nurturing and caring. If someone has a problem. this turns you on. You are highly sexual, passionate, loyal and intense in your involvement, sometimes possessive and jealous. Sex to you is a pleasure to be enjoyed. You are stimulated be the eccentric and the unusual, having a tendency to be free and open.

Comparing the IKEAs: The New and the Old


Over the weekend, we went to two different IKEAs. The old one at Alexandra Village, and the new one at Tampines.

On Saturday we met up with Samuel and Andrew and Anthony for a spot of rounding in the sun. After getting suitably sunburnt and very near to getting heatstroke, we went for dinner.



9 people and one puny little tofu.

But what the heck. We were hungry!



After this dinner, Anthony had a sudden urge to go to IKEA, so Lazychoo and I accompanied him to the one at Tampines.

And boy, was it packed.

The outside...


The queue..


And the inside...



This would be us camwhoring while waiting in the queue to get in.



Didn't get much pictures inside because it was so packed and we were so busy dodging elbows that we didn't think of whipping out the camera.

Met my Leeling jiejie and my godmother there though. Such a surprise.

Lazychoo was craving for IKEA chicken wings so we headed over to the Swiss cafe and queued up for about half an hour before we were told there were no more chicken wings.

Dammit.

This was all that was left when we decided to whip out the cameras.



Then on Sunday, we went squeezing along with the mass of bodies who, like us, decided to go to the Big Boys Toys + SITEX exhibitions.



By the time Anthony got his hard drive and Lazychoo got his HDD casing and some thingamabob for the Bluetooth and we finally got out of the halls, I had on a suitably black face for being pushed around by dirty old men.

I hate people touching me. Especially dirty old men and aunties who don't know how to keep their elbows by their sides.

Anyway, since Lazychoo was still craving for IKEA chicken wings we went to the one at Alexandra to avoid the crowd.

No difference. It was still packed. Dammit.

From the carpark,


Me, messing around with Lazychoo's sunglasses.


Giving the really kiam-pa face.

We walked around IKEA aimlessly and I got inspired to buy a small house of my own. Anybody got any details? Any real estate agents to make it possible for me to get my own small cosy little one bedroom apartment?

Oh, and I absolutely love one of the show kitchens. It's so.... nice and cosy.

We found a LOT of those wooden toys in the shape of people that can be twisted into a desired position, so Lazychoo and Anthony embarked on a mini project.



The outcome of their project,



And the outcome of mine.



While finally having our chicken wings, Benguin walked past with this small heart-shaped soft toy dangling from his belt buckle. He told us that some people at the door were giving it out. We got jealous, and went to look for it.

Ta-dum!



Ta-Dee!



Ta-Doo~



And yes, even my darling Tracy wasn't spared.

Just Married




Although the hearts look suspicously like the ones Ikea is handing out to everyone.

Lazychoo's and Anthony's bike, people! Give them a round of applause!

Ok, no wait, this is seriously overdue.



Melvin and Angeline's wedding.

Happy marriage, guys. Have a baby as soon as possible, hor.

Virtual Pets


This is me being too bored in office and adopting virtual pets everywhere.

Here're my fish tanks. This is Bloody,



And Jaws the metal fish surrounded by real fish. See if you can spot him.



This is Prince Monty Regalis,



who was supposed to be Tracy's stud, but I accidently set Tracy's sex as male too, so they absolutely hate each other now.

Here's my two chinchillas and two gerbils, both breeding pairs, but I haven't uploaded any pictures for them yet, so now all you can see are their stats.



This is Feline (pronounced Fer-Leen)



This is Marvin, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.



And this is what happens when I put both of them together.



These are my original NeoPets,



And to prove I've gone officially crazy, here's Violetta.



A little gift for myself.

Anybody got them links to Pet Rocks? I found one, but it only supports Macs.

Being really kaypoh


I've been really kaypoh about a fellow blogger's situation.

http://joewei.blogspot.com/

She was my Ah Yang korkor's friend. After he died, she sent me a message through friendster and gave me a link to her blog, in which she wrote about him.

Anyway, after reading her blog, I am so damn PISSED OFF at SBB, even though it's totally no business of mine. She's been through so much, and he's still being such an ass.

Another friend of mine also named Ting, declares that she will skin him alive if she finds out that he wants the baby to recognise him as her dad.

I don't really kow her, but I feel as if I've known her for a long time from reading her blog. Which explains why I'm caring so much.

Wouldn't you?

Today's Idiot Customer of the Day


"I'd like to make an appointment for servicing. Saturday 1pm."

"How about 2? 1pm is kind of rushed because the technicians will be having lunch."

"I don't care. How long is the servicing? I understand that the spoiler will also be done at your place?"

"The servicing takes less than an hour. The spoiler is not done here, it's done at ***."

"But the agent says to go to this one place only what, now ask me go here go there.. *nags incoherently* You all under the same company right? How come all dunno this dunno that one? Agent say one thing you say another. I feel so cheated. Ridiculous!"

"M'am, we are only the authorised servicing center. NOT the same company."

"I don't care, I want you to bring the spoiler over to your side to do."

"We are not fully-equipted to fix up the spoiler. We can try though, but if the spoiler spoils then we can't be responsible for that."

"I DON'T CARE!"

"Then I can't help you much either."

"Then how much is the charge for the servicing? Honda Fit."

"$XXX.XX for fully-synthetic engine oil, *rambles off items included inside the package*"

"SO EXPENSIVE! YOU THINK YOU ALL VERY HIGH CLASS HAR? Outside at this so-and-so place give you so-and-so package also cheaper than you! Ridiculous! Ridiculous!"

*mutters under her breath* "... then go there lah. No money don't buy car lah."

"Hello? You there or not?"

"Well, if you want to go to other places for servicing, you're free to go. But if you do, the warranty will be void if they happen to spoil anything."

"Ridiculous!" Hangs up phone.

Two minutes later...

Phone rings.

"If I want to bring my own engine oil then how?"

"Then we will minus off $XX from the amount of $XX for the normal mineral package." Explains the process.

"Then I pay the remaining $XX for what? I thought you said labour free?"

"Company policy m'am."

"Ridiculous! I go outside to the where-where-where and they do what-what-what altogether also cheaper!"

Holds the line. Begs supervisor for permission to say "Outside cheaper then go outside lah! No money don't buy car lah!" Supervisor dismisses the idea. Tells me to handle it myself.

Unholds. "So do you still want to make an appointment, or do you want to go to this so-and-so company which you claim is cheaper?"

Suddenly launches into a series of complaints. "I am going to bring up this case. In fact I already wrote a letter to the company to complain about this case. Your engine prices are ridiculous! You think you very high class ah?"

Ya, as if she can write a complaint letter within 2 minutes.

About to explain that I am not the big fuck who sets the engine prices, because if I were I'd charge everybody else low but charge her double, and if she doesn't come back the warranty will be void, so whatever spoils in her car she can go screw herself. Then changed my mind. Let her complain, I want to see her constipated face when the higher levels tell her to go screw herself.

"So you still want that appointment?"

Huffs and puffs and almost pops a vein. I think there's are spider webs of wrinkles all over her face, she gets angry and excited so easily. "Of course la!" Gives details.

"Don't burst a vein or something." I got that last line in before I hung up.

People, if you see a frigid constipated bitch driving a Honda Fit one the road the the numbers 4041, nudge somebody to go and kiss her.. bumper.

Yay.

The very definition of...




Hairy.

Found this baby at one of the haunted staircases of my office building. Maybe it's this guy who's been spooking me out, making loud thumping noises and footsteps following me whenever I use that staircase.

Visions


Prelude: Somebody dislikes reading me but reads me every single day. Tracking down all that one doesn't like to see. No life, leh, you.


Have you thought about what those people with near-death experiences say about having their life flashing before their eyes?

Have you ever wondered which part of your life would flash past you when you're an inch away from an imminent death?

Would you see yourself, doing things that you love? Maybe, speeding on your bike to Kulai for supper with friends, or playing tennis with close friends, or flying a kite by the beach, or maybe even sitting at home watching TV with a loved one?

Would you see your loved ones, flashing before your eyes? Your mother, bustling about the kitchen making your favorite soup. Your grandparents, smiling toothlessly at how grown up you are. Your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife, whispering sweet nothings into your ears as you both spend a romantic evening together. Or maybe even your pets, greeting you enthusiastically when you come home from work.

Would you see your achievements, from an outside angle? You, winning the trophy for your team at a soccer match. You, taking wedding photos with your husband/wife. You, having your first child. You, closing that big business deal.

How about the sad things that happened in your life? Closing the lid of the casket containing a loved one. Losing a big business deal. Seperation from your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend.

Or maybe even the things you're most guilty about. Lying about something, causing someone else to be blamed. Deliberatly doing/saying something to hurt others. Leaving rubbishy comments anonymously on other people's blogs.

What would you see?

I've been in situations like that. I know what I saw, and I know what I'll see.

Nothing. Emptiness. Blanko.

When something happens, all that I can do is to concentrate on what's happening then. And when the horror is about to happen and I recoil in terror, my mind goes blank.

Blissfully blank.

What do you think you'll see?

Random Pictoblog of the Week


I am so damn bored. There's nothing to do here in office. So, here's (yet) another random pictoblog to entertain.. myself!

Well, regarding the few previous posts, I actually had more to talk about but I guess they're getting to depressing to read.

Next time then.

Anyway, here's Uncle Stanley's Hayabusa,



and his meter that I took when we were flying down the expressway at 250km/h with the rpm at 12k.


Yeah, right. As if you'd believe that.

Ok, so I took that by turning on the ignition and letting the needle do a complete run when I took that picture. You wouldn't believe the amount of times I had to turn the darn thing on and off just to get that effect. Thanks to Uncle Stanley for being a good sport in letting me mess around with his bike.

Here's Lazychoo messing around with Alan See's goggles. Alan's got these goggles because he's wearing a scrambler helmet, those types without the visor. And He's riding a BMW. Action, lah.



Benguin and Jinhan trying to spoil Ben's X1's suspension. Ben thought with the extra weight behind it'd be easier to pop a wheelie.


Well you thought wrong.

Zeke getting influenced by Vik and being gay with Ben.


Check out Zeke's really cute dimples.

Camwhoring Ben.



Yay. I like camwhoring people.

This is what we're having in office right now.



They're hung on keys. Keys. Because we don't have anywhere else to hang them on.

Haha. Ok ok, so here's the real reason why I'm blogging today. I found this picture online labelled "Art of Seduction", and I couldn't resist poking fun.



This was uploaded by herself, captioned by herself, and everything's on friendster.

Looks more like the Art of Learning to Seduce but Failing Miserably because Taking Pictures while on the Can (toilet) is Totally Not Seducing At All. Seems like she's taking a dump and playing with her handphone, and at some point during the dump she decided to take a picture of her still-puberty-ing torso, and deciding that the picture is seductive she posted it on friendster hoping that someone will find her sexy and f.................... oh never mind.