I don't know what kind of title this post deserves so...
It's 5 in the morning and I am.. kind of lonely, kind of depressed, kind of have the desire to run away, kind of think I shouldn't be blogging about this because it'd get me into trouble again but thinking, what the heck right?
Mumble jumble.
I found a part-time night job with really flexible hours and relatively high pay.
I thought we were strong enough for me to trust him and leave him alone because I don't want to have to keep watch over him for the rest of our relationship.
And the first night I was working, he went out and broke a promise.
Oh yay. Woo-fucking-hoo.
Don't want to divulge too much here in case some c***s******c***b***m*****n****t****p*******c*****d*** enjoy themselves at me and Lazy's relationship's expanse.
Seriously? It takes two hands to clap. So I fucking hate you ALL. Including the very patronizing YOU.
"Giving you my trust is like putting my hand in yours. If you hurt it, I'm taking it back."
Hell yea I am.
4 comments:
This is Sosincal again. Seems you need something to change in your life. You seem so with it and yet so, sometimes, out of it. Wish I could help you.
Jas,
You need to get something to do in your life that will preoccupy yourself so much that you won't have the time to get hung up over Kenny 24/7.
You know how I have been with Mel for the past 5 years - I'd always say I can't let go, everything he does freakin' hurts, all his friends were against me, blah blah.
Now I barely see him twice a month, and I'm also enjoying my life with my OWN friends(no relations to my bf whatsoever).
I'm learning to let go. Or at least take it easy.
So could you.
Well, if you put it that way, no point having a boyfriend or even be in love anyway, is there?
So you mean there is a point to be hurt so often?
Anyway, what I meant was to find your own personality back and not the JasmineKenny persona.
Quoting my current close friend, he asked, "How long since you've been you?" The Jasmine pre-Kenny?
Maybe you should bring her out to play and just do what you want to do >for now< instead of getting hung up over what others think of your relationship.
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